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Hotties | Kids | Idiot | Kiss Cam

Hotties

  • Hottie on the big screen
  • Do I make you randy? ...ya baby
  • Look at that punam
  • I got stuck in your dirty pillows
  • Bon journo Prisci Pesca
  • Beauty, eh?
  • Ah-ROOOOOO-ga!
  • Woof Woof, (pant, pant, pant)
  • Schwiiiing!
  • Helloooooo, Betty!
  • Skin to win!
  • She"s a dynamite broad
  • How YOU doin"?
  • Hoochie Mama!
  • Mama Sita!
  • Chicquitas!
  • Tenderoni
  • They're real, and they're spectacular
  • Wookie!
  • What"s your sign? Mine"s "Feces"
  • Howdy do!
  • She"s knockin"me out with those American thighs
  • Workin"double time on that seduction line
  • Muchas feminitas!
  • Chicks on trampolines
  • I love you...I honestly love you
  • I want YOU to want ME
  • Spoon!
  • Abondanza!
  • She is deliciously saucy
  • I"d like to have a go with that filly
  • She makes me toit like a toiger
  • Bet she"s had more hands up her skirt than a muppet
  • She"s a 15 year old love slave with webbed feet
  • You"re going the right way for a smacked bottom, and I don"t care who knows it
  • Hi, I"m Dixie...Dixie Normous
  • Wild American Fox-es!
  • I like my women middle aged...14, 15, 16
  • It"s like jello on springs
  • Hot, hot...very HOT!
  • It"s Ho-Bag and the Baggetts
  • Why, it"s Bobbi-Sue Saucybottom
  • She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but she broke it off
  • H-O-T-P-Q! She"s so hot they had to add 2 letters!
  • I"m not bad...I"m just drawn that way
  • You should be kissed and often, by someone who knows how
  • Look out! Machine gun jobblies!
  • My girlfriend asked me to be more affectionate...so now I have TWO girlfriends
  • I can read women like a book...and I prefer the braile edition
  • If you are what you eat, then she must be cheap, fast, and easy
  • Champaign wishes and caviar dreams
  • You look mahvelous
  • I"ll have what she"s having
  • Of all the gin joints in all the towns in the world, she walks into mine
  • That"s..uh...quite a dress that you almost have on
  • Shapely"s the name, and that"s the way I like "em
  • What big eyes you have!
  • Come to Butthead
  • She"s not your type...she"s not inflatable
  • The Guns of Navarone!
  • She"s a carpenter"s dream: lies flat as a board and is easy to screw
  • She"s a bit of alright now, ain"t she?
  • Babia Majora!
  • Women should be obscene and not heard
Hotties | Kids | Idiot | Kiss Cam

Kids

  • She"s as happy as a little girl
  • Enough Dr. Pepper for you, my little friend
  • Where"s that damn leash?
  • A little Jack Daniels in the Pepsi will settle that down
  • My hockey mom can beat up your soccer mom
  • Back in your seat, missy
  • Quick! Get a bucket of Riddilin
  • Too much chocolate in their stockings
  • Just be glad he"s not YOUR kid!
  • You call this a happy family? Why do we have all these kids?
  • The face of a child says it all...especially the mouth part of the face
  • Remember kids...strangers have the best candy
  • Uh-oh...somebody has some daddy issues
  • Daddy drinks because you cry
  • It"s like frickin"cat nip for clones
  • Heal Mini-Me...I"ve got me a marlin!
  • Looks like 2 eggs in a hanky
  • Now son, you don"t want to drink beer. That"s for daddies...and kids with fake ID"s
Hotties | Kids | Idiot | Kiss Cam

Idiot

  • Ya...I remember my first beer
  • Too many freaks, not enough circuses
  • Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups
  • Quick, get a bucket a riddilin
  • Yet another endorsement for population control
  • Stop it buddy, you"re killin"me
  • Your routine grows tiresome
  • I see you"ve taken this opportunity to embarrass yourself in public
  • Turko is back
  • They"re coming to take me away, a ha, he he, ho ho
  • What a sad reflection on society as we know it
  • I see the Tractor Pull let out early tonight
  • Sideshow Bob has escaped from prison!
  • Zero to stupid in 2.7 beers
  • College students: they drink more before 9 AM than most people drink all day
  • If only we could switch alcohol"s effect on brain cells and fat cells
  • Stupid should hurt
  • Maybe your purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others
  • Not the brightest crayon in the box now are we?
  • So many stupid people, so few comets
  • One tequila, two tequila, three keteela, FLOOR
  • Welcome to reality. Visit again soon
  • Time is a great healer, but a lousy beautician
  • Youth is fleeting, but immaturity can last a lifetime
  • OK, who stopped payment on his reality check?
  • If it"s tourist season, why can"t we shoot them?
  • Proof of Einstein"s theory that there is no limit to human stupidity
  • Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
  • That takes care of the heebies....but I've still got the jeebies
  • 100,000 sperm, and HE was the fastest?
  • Some people are only alive because it's illegal to shoot them
  • Beer: it's not just for breakfast anymore
  • He took an IQ test, and the results were negative
  • Conciousness--that annoying time between naps
  • Fear the mullet
  • I"d rather have a free bottle in front of me, than a pre-frontal lobotomy
  • I see you set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public
  • That"s just disturbing
  • An example of Reintarnation: Coming back as a hillbilly
  • Clothes make the man-naked people have little or no influence on society
  • Apparently he"s leaving his body to Science...fiction!
  • Finally 21 and legally able to do everything they"ve been doing since they were 13
  • He looked a lot better in the chat room
  • Gay-Dar!
  • Oh, look! The cover boy for "Who"s Who In Mental Illness"
  • Is that a blow hole under your hat?
  • Call Greenpeace-we have a beached whale in the arena
  • Weebles wobble, but they don"t fall down
  • He"s so fat, he could use a hula-hoop to hold up his pants
  • I bet he buys his clothes at Tents-R-Us
  • Do you eat until you"re full or until you"re tired?
  • He"s so fat, if he broke his leg, gravy would spill out
  • He"s so fat he can"t wear an X jacket, or helicopters would try to land on his back
  • I could stay in shape running laps around his waist
  • You"re pullin"the moon out of orbit!
  • When you go to the zoo, do the animals try to feed YOU?
  • Whatever THAT was, it"s givng RuPaul a run for his money
  • Our collective conciousness just dropped about 4 points
  • Unfortunately, that"s now burned into my memory
  • She"s a real head turner...the other way!
  • What"s the size of those pants? Large? Extra Large? or Oh-My-God-It"s-Comin"-At-Us?
  • What are YOU doing? That is correct!
  • He sure has a purty mouth
  • I see you were seduced by the Dork Side of the Farce
  • That"s 45 seconds I"ll never get back!
  • He has the body of a god-unfortunately it"s Buddah
  • Just say no-to seconds
  • That guy looks like Jello with ears
  • When he goes into a 7-11 I bet it"s a 6-10 when he comes out
  • Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an a-hole
  • Warning: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your shirt
  • Looks like he finally got his head together, but his body is falling apart
  • It"s easier to get older than it is to get wiser
  • He tried to get a life once, but they were all out of stock
  • He went to school to become a wit, but only got halfway through
  • A future contestant on "Spaz, Geek, or Dweeb"
  • You said "no"to drugs, but apparently they didn"t listen
  • Now I know why some animals eat their young
  • Warning: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard
  • Warning: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
  • Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
  • He who laughs last, thinks slowest
  • B, double E, double R, U, N: Beer Run!
  • Oh...I get it! You don"t own a full length mirror!
  • If you"ve got something to say, please raise your hand...and place it over your mouth
  • Life: it"s sexually transmitted and ALWAYS fatal
  • My cat has coughed-up better looking hair styles
  • Ignoranus: both stupid AND an a-hole
  • Shouldn"t you be at home airing-up the tires on your house?
  • There"s an alcoholic who doesn"t want to remain anonymous
  • You shouldn"t drink on an empty head
  • I bet if I follow you home someone ugly will open the door
  • If I could afford the wood, I"d have your mouth boarded up
  • When you eat out, does the waiter ask if you want an estimate?
  • Hey, big boy, stick around after the game, we want to show a movie on your back
  • Who dressed the keg?
  • His blood type is Ragu
  • His high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph
  • When he gets in an elevator, he HAS to go down
  • I bet he has to iron his pants in the driveway
  • I bet his cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard
  • That guy"s be-hind must have it"s own congressman
  • He better feed his butt...it"s eating his pants
  • When he dances, I bet he makes the band skip
  • Do you put your belt on with a boomerang?
  • He"s so fat he"d be taller layin"down
  • Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity
  • There is ALWAYS one more imbecile than you counted on
  • He"s so fat, when he takes a bath the water level in the toilet rises
  • If you can"t be a good example, then you"ll just have to be a terrible warning
  • They have an opening for you at the witless protection program
  • I"m sorry, but I don"t speak alcoholic
  • You make me wish I"d donated to Planned Parenthood
  • What holds your ears apart?
  • This year"s poster child for Zero Population Growth
  • We"ll have a telethon for you later
  • There"s a guy who will NEVER get cancer of the brain
  • That man could pose on the cover of Dork magazine
  • Cut that jibba-jabba; I pity da fool who cheers for (other team)
  • Hey, hey, hey! (Fat Albert)
  • Momma says "Stupid is as stupid does"
  • I am not an animal! I am a human being!
  • Insanity doesn"t run in your family...it practically gallops!
  • They are two wild and cr-a-zy guys!
  • If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose
  • I bet you just read "Bi-Curious George Goes to the Hockey Game"
  • He"s a Dutch metallurgical hedonist who lost his genitalia in an unfortunate smelting accident
  • I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid
  • You are validating my inherent distrust of strangers
  • Whatever look you were going for...you missed
  • A toast to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to all of life"s problems!
  • Son, when you participate in sporting events, it"s not whether you win or lose, it"s how drunk you get!
  • Maybe, just once, someone will call you "Sir"without adding "you"re making a scene"
  • I see dumb people
  • When you were a baby, I bet they baptized you at Sea World
  • His face is so big he needs a bookmark to find his chin
  • He"s so fat
    ...when he steps on a scale it says "One at a time, please"
    ...his neck looks like a package of hot dogs
    ...he stepped on a rainbow and it made Skittles
    ...when he was born he gave the hospital stretch marks
    ...his legs look like spoiled milk-all white and chunky
    ...he sets of car alarms when he runs
    ...when he goes to the movies he sits next to EVERYONE
    ...when his beeper goes off, people think he"s backing up
    ...he was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed him as the New World
    ...when he goes to a restaurant, looks over the menu, and says "OKAY"
    ...he puts his deodorant on with a paint roller
    ...he has to pull down his pants to get into his pockets
  • Some people are like slinkies-- not really good for anything, but you can"t help but smile when you see them tumble down the stairs
  • Some cause happiness wherever they go-others WHEVER they go
  • How come your house has wheels but your car doesn"t?
  • Whatever kind of look you"re going for, you missed!
  • Enough viagra already...we need some brain-agra!
Hotties | Kids | Idiot | Kiss Cam

Kiss Cam

  • Tonsil hockey!
  • Mop her throat!
  • Careful, easy, they have braces!
  • It"s OK if they"re related...they"re from Nebraska
  • Get a room
  • I can see they"ve taken french lessons
  • Hey, hey, hey...this is a family show
  • That"s as appropriate as a french kiss at a family reunion
  • That's why the Lady Is a Tramp
  • That takes care of the heebies...but I've still got the jeebies
  • Time for a spirited bout of Skanko Roman wrestling
  • Hi Schmoopie! Hi, Schmoopie! No, YOU"RE Schmoopie!
  • Torn between two lovers, actin"like a fool
  • I love you, but I"m not IN love with you
  • I saw that on the Discovery Channel
  • Can"t get enough of that nasty stuff!
  • I like to watch
  • Oh, Frank! My lips are hot! Kiss my hot lips!
  • Would you like to dance, or would you rather just suck face?
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