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303's Dictionary of "You Suck"

  • Your performance is not up to par.
  • You emit a malodorous stench.
  • You are a black hole of incompetence.
  • You inhale adverse calamity as if it were mother’s milk.
  • Your abilities are dubious at best.
  • The static cling of misfortune gathers on you like no-luck lint.
  • Your reputation is besmirched and sullied.
  • Your lack of talent creates a vacuum whose suction nearly drains your team of its very will to live.
  • You are a despicable, vacuous rapscallion.
  • You exhibit a degree of mental deficiency between that of an idiot and the moron.
  • You apparently didn’t stop to think.
  • Your insignificance cannot be measured, even on the sub-atomic level.
  • Your misfortune brings us glee.
  • Your athleticism is so bereft of quality that Satan and his minions would be challenged to embrace your clumsy exertion.
  • You are an improvident lack-wit.
  • Your actions are those of an imbecile.
  • You play like nasal pastry on a nilla wafer.
  • You demonstrate hitherto uncharted mental and physical sluggishness.
  • You disgust us with your dastardly behavior.
  • Your legendary stupidity grows with each boorish effort.
  • You are the four-headed creature of a dimbulb, a nimrod, a baffoon, and a plebeian.
  • Your mutating ineptitude cannot be contained by the galaxies of the known universe.
  • You manifest an overarching lack of cognitive attention that is remarkable even by sanitarium standards.
  • You are the winner of this evening’s Golden Dipstick Award.

In Summary: We deem you unworthy of praise, and we loath your very existence….and if you come back, we shall taunt you a second time!


I have no questions, only statements: (opposing team or player) suck(s)!

You suck more than anyone could possibly imagine. You suck out loud. You suck on toast. Your force me to use the word "suck," a term I normally find mildly abhorrent, simply because you suck. Your suckiness is thorough, diligent, and complete. You are to be congratulated on the sheer depth of your suckation. This is simply meant as a criticism, and not to impugn your character. I can't even imagine you sucking this badly in other areas of your life. But man….you SUCK!

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